Feminism and who is a Feminist Hobbyist?

For starters, feminism is a rather loud topic that many people prefer to stay away from much less talk about. But it’s hard to ignore. Despite its simplicity in concept, it is a subject that can provoke sexist opinions or inspire valuable perspectives.


Feminism
is multi-angular, affecting everyday life from dating and sex to office politics. For centuries it has adversely and favorably impacted social, political and economic values. Hobbyists, what is your position in the equation?

Are you a gentleman who supports feminism? There are plenty of hobbyists (or punters if you are reading these words from the United Kingdom) who respect their companions as equals. Why shouldn’t they?

Feminism in a nutshell

Feminism means different things to different people:

  • A doctrine that inspires belief in the social, political and economical equality of the sexes
  • A movement that seeks to eliminate discrimination against women
  • A concept that believes not in male bashing because one sex is not better than the other

Benefits of feminism

Thanks to the movement, women are ‘more like men’ more than ever before. Today’s modern woman is strong and motivated enough to take care of herself. She seeks adventure and independence and does not believe that her success should be curtailed by society’s limitations. An independent escort is the perfect example of a woman who believes in feministic values. Feminism encourages women to achieve their dreams just as men do.

Feminism implies friends with benefits

Sex is now more casual than ever. Friends or acquaintances that have an understanding to ‘indulge in each other’ free from the complications of a relationship is a trend that has evolved in the last twenty years. The benefits are clear as long as both parties are honest about their intentions and do not harbor secret agendas in hopes for more. ‘Friends with benefits’ is a baggage-free way of enjoying each other in a simple approach that can ignite unbridled passion. Convenience is a huge factor, leaving enjoyment just a phone call away.

Through feminism guys can be themselves

Empowerment of women has leveled the playing field as a by-product of feminism, thus relaxing the rules of etiquette. However, a fog of mixed messages hovers over the dating process about what is and is not expected of men. Though guys enjoy more freedom of expression (especially in a hobbyist/companion relationship) a woman will always appreciate gentlemanly gestures!

There are many male celebrities who support feminism such as George Clooney, Matt Damon and Anderson Cooper

In American culture, there is this idea that women want to take away men’s rights. That is ludicrous and not at all what feminism is about. As a hobbyist, while you may not consider yourself a feminist, if you believe in equality of the sexes and equal rights, you may be. Ending worldwide violence against women is a prevailing cause of feminism lead by Ted Bunch, co-founder of A Call to Men: The National Association of Men and Women Committed to Ending Violence Against Women. Google it.

City Girls takes a bow to those hobbyists who believe that independent escorts (and all women for that matter) are not second class citizens. Injustice or disrespect to any human being is a crime against humanity and we salute those who respect genders equally!

Mastering the Art of Sexual Timing

When it comes to intimacy, timing can get tricky but it is everything: when to move in for the first kiss, the first caress or the first toast. Gentleness, simplicity and humor are keys. Knowing when to get aggressive is equally important. These are all a part of the great dance of love that we will talk about in the next blog article.

timing first kiss hobbyistMoving in for the first kiss

If you really want to rock the earth off its axis, build a strong sense of comfort in your date. Chances are excellent that she will be drop dead gorgeous as are all City Girls’ independent escorts. Such a quality can cause any hobbyist to feel a little shaky about himself. Establishing a physical and emotional comfort zone with a little small talk, laughter and perhaps a cocktail or two can really break the ice. Just be yourself. When the moment arrives (and you will know it!), do it in silence. At that point, don’t justify yourself. Just go for it.

Loosen her mind and you will free her body

Ever met an independent escort who is dying to be with you? As in, she can’t wait to get past those introductory moments because she wants to put her hands and then some all over you? As desirous as she may be when you first meet, assume that there is more to be discovered and strive to turn her on. Ecstasy will explode! Tell her what you want, what you like and how you want to feel. Tell her what you want to do with her in between introductory kisses. Careful what you ask for, my friends!

Be blunt and honest

Without using words from the gutter, tell her exactly what you want. Any companion loves a hobbyist who is direct and to the point as long as he is a gentleman. Women from all walks of life (whether secretly or overtly) get turned on by such direct behavior. Unless you are into fetish and domination, manipulation is not an option. Be kind and respectful at all times.

Be covertly sexual in public

Oooh la la! Guys. We women find this terribly exciting! If you are out on a dinner date with an independent escort and want to set the erotic pace for “desert”, slowly slide your hand up her thigh and gently caress just around her panty line for several seconds. This little act will be a priceless investment in your timing as you just may find yourself being attacked on your way home in the elevator!

Touch her slowly

Every independent escort into the girl friend experience is turned on by a man’s virility. After she has ravished you with attention and brought you to multiple conclusions, it’s time to tease her with your touch.
Perhaps you both are enjoying a second glass of wine and feeding each other with chocolates, laughing and chatting intimately. Start with a slow massage, maybe licking her toes. Work your way up her legs with a hint of oil, pausing to explore her hips. Continue on to her navel and keep going until you reach her neck and shoulders. By then, she is sure to be panting with anticipation. You know what to do next…

Timing is everything

At City Girls, we realize that you can do anything but you cannot do everything. Sensuality is a little like politics: your activities are not necessarily about how you do them but when you do them. Life is all about timing. We want every hobbyist to be on top of your game, not ahead of your time.

Before Entering a Casual Relationship

Casual relationships are often referred to as “friends with benefits” (FWB). An exciting encounter can be essential to a man’s or a woman’s lifestyle. Casual relationships are no longer enjoyed just by players.

Nowadays, there are many reasons why a companion or hobbyist will seek a casual relationship. But we cannot forget the human element and its need for emotional fulfillment on some level, recognizing that all casual relationships are date stamped. In the meantime, City Girls would like to explore a few tidbits of advice on how you can get the most out of a casual relationship that will flourish with fun and sensual excitement.

Courtesy counts for both the companion and the hobbyist

Just because it’s an FWB relationship doesn’t mean that you are exempt from polite behavior. Friends deserve courtesy just as much as a wives, husbands, elders and bosses. If you must break an engagement, do it with as much advance notice as possible. Make sure that your excuse is valid and doesn’t offend your partner. Excessive cancelations are just unacceptable. If that’s the case, it’s better to be in a relationship with yourself. Whether you are a hobbyist or an independent escort, total disconnect is a great and inconsiderate way to confuse your friend. Communicate your boundaries and stick to them without creating a guessing game otherwise known as drama.


Respect prevails in any type of relationship

We all have needs. Just because it’s a casual relationshipdoesn’t mean that man or woman should treat each other as emotionless sex objects (okay, well maybe you are a mega machine in the sack but you’re still human!) Take heed of yourfriend’s time, feelings and emotions. These actions do not imply that you will automatically merge into a long term relationship(unless that’s what is meant to happen); it just means that you are honoring the boundaries of the FWB interactions. On the other hand, if you remain casual but your partner shows signs of deeper involvement that is known as a conflict of interest. Out of respect for each other, it is time to re-evaluate the relationship. I have never understood why anyone in any sort of relationshipwould fail to respect the other. That is just poor character.

A girlfriend experience may be considered a casual relationship

While I may be venturing off track a bit, I think it is worth mentioning that the definition of the girlfriend experience has broadened to take on a wider array of interpretations as to how a companion will conduct herself. There are those independent escorts (some ladies refer to themselves as elite courtesans) who maintain ongoing relationships with their clients that take on characteristics of a casual relationship. And then there is the sugar baby/sugar daddy relationship which is often casual. Perhaps these types of casual relationships are easier for the partners to remain within their boundaries because each party plays a role: companion and hobbyist (or client).

The casual relationship enjoys its freedom

Freedom is not only about dating as many people as you want although this kind of freedom does fall into the description of most hobbyists. But for many (and especially independent escorts), freedom gained from being in a casual relationship equals the flexibility to devote attention to other areas of your life while having your erotic needs met. Whether for hobbyist or companion, taking on all of the obligations associated with a traditional relationship doesn’t fit into the scope of the lifestyle that a casual relationship satisfies. Void are weekend barbeques with your partner’s family where you must be in your Sunday best; attending work functions when you’d rather be getting your nails done or watching the game or keeping the house clean 24/7.

When does the fun expire?

Every casual relationship has an expiration date. Usually, one partner changes his or her needs or desires or meets someone else. Or, both simply tire of each other and decide to move on. In any case, acknowledging that this is neither a long term relationship nor a one-night booty call will allow FWB to flow with ease. Most of the time, the concept of remaining friends (and I am talking about truefriendship) after a casual relationship has ended is false and unlikely to happen.

So boys and girls, if you are lucky enough to fulfill your physical needs in a spicy, steamy, casual relationship, more power to you. Live in the moment, treat the relationship with the respect it deserves and don’t worry about tomorrow. City Girls will take care of that!

Keeping a Relationship Alive

Marriage has always been praised as a building block of our civilization. If you are married and super lucky, your relationship is happy, enjoyable and full of good loving. That is the ideal.

But for some, today’s modern world acknowledges that this frail institution has evolved and they resort to more colorful tactics to retain happiness, satisfaction, sanity, family, children and pocketbook. A good many independent escorts are married with children or have significant others. Certainly, many hobbyists are married and of course there are those who are living single.

When did marriage modernize?

I believe in the sanctity of marriage wholeheartedly. But nowadays, we are seeing relationships mutate into more intricate forms of compatibility in efforts to avoid the results of costly and hurtful circumstances. Some couples think outside of the box and realize that for their marriage to survive, a more congenial approach must be taken. Otherwise, separation and divorce (watch out for those hungry attorneys!) prevail. The kids suffer and homes are practically cut in half with a knife. There is bloodshed. Ever see War of the Roses?

Today’s marriages are filled with arrangements and understandings

Sometimes spoken and sometimes silent, couples go on sabbatical, realizing that the alternative is far worse than accepting an understanding. One may resort to having an extramarital affair as the other goes about fulfilling goals while the couple retains a deep friendship. Even though this may taste bittersweet, is there anything wrong with it? I guess it depends on your religion. Let’s keep an open mind.

When one party has no interest in intimacy

What if your wife just isn’t into it? You’ve been married for 35 years; the house is paid for and the kids are out of college. You are still good friends but she wants to lunch and travel with her girlfriends and basically gives you card blanch to satisfy those ‘extracurricular’ needs. Hold onto your knickers, handsome! Perhaps spending a weekend with a knee-knocking beauty (with brains) in the form of an independent escort who wants only you for desert could return a glow to your once rosy demeanor. This is where the girlfriend experience really comes into play. Perhaps a newlywed would take offense to this concept but I think we are way beyond that.

When a couple wants to explore the addition of a third party

Tables turned. Your wife is a hotty and can’t get enough. Her neck is twisting when the pool man walks by (or when that cute, busty waitress serves your desert). You’re still the bomb but it’s her fantasies that are bursting apart at the seams. Don’t deny her but play it safe. Allow her to select an independent escort who understands the fragility between a trio and watch your marriage go to the tenth power. Many independent escorts specialize in spending time with couples and actually make great friendships in the process. Seriously.

When a couple realizes that they’ll both benefit from growth apart

There are those who recognize that there is no other way to stay together than by being apart. While the relationship may not be fruitful there is history that just cannot be uprooted. Seeking a relationship or fling outside of the marriage is risky and time consuming. Meeting women at bars, the gym or tennis club – all have strings attached. You really have no idea who you are meeting or dealing with until you’ve spent time and dollars to find out that she’s not the one for you. Whether you decide to get into hobbying or just dip your toes into dating an independent escort, you are more in control of your choices. Compatibility and nurturing your needs are top priority when you spend time with an independent escort. Many independent escorts are amazing women as you just may find your time together develop into something lasting and meaningful.

City Girls is committed to supporting our members

When is anything ever totally straight forward? Everyone has their own, unique circumstances. At City Girls, we take a positive approach when considering the powerful dynamics and happiness that result when our VIP Members and Club Members connect. If you choose to turn a new leaf and think outside of your relationship for whatever reason, we feel that your decision deserves attention. We are here for you.

The Confident Hobbyist

Sometimes even the most confident man can be painfully shy. Couple that with being a worrier and the combination spells stress! How does a hobbyist overcome this poisonous combination when he has a beautiful, head-turning escort waiting for his arrival in less than two hours?

Since you deserve to enjoy your time together, we at City Girls personally spoke to several of our lovely ladies and got their feedback. Below is real advice from amazing girlfriends who have experienced firsthand helping their hobbyist friends overcome shyness and increase their confidence in the dating realm.

Truly relaxing will solve half the battle

I know. You’ve heard it a million times. But it’s true. Calming and quieting the mind promote relaxation which in turn dissolves stress and anxiety associated with shyness or lack of confidence. Many of our independent escorts practice yoga on a regular basis and this is what they have shared. While you may not even be able to touch your toes, you do know how to breathe and this is the key. Before leaving for your date, sit down in a quiet room in a relaxed position with the television, radio and cell phone off and out of reach. Close your eyes and focus on long, deep breaths. The second your mind runs away (and this will be the challenge), gently direct your thoughts back to your breath as you slowly inhale and exhale. Do this for about ten minutes or as long as you can. If you’ve got an alarm clock on your cell phone, set it. That way you won’t have to wonder how long you’ve been sitting there breathing. Ten minutes might seem like an eternity if you’re new to this form of meditation. Try.

Dressing and smelling well are major confidence boosters

Don’t get complacent about your wardrobe or the senses. Women love a well-dressed man and that is the overwhelming consensus with all of our City Girlsindependent escorts. This doesn’t mean that you need to blow off $2,000 at Gucci for a pair of loafers and a tie (unless you want to, of course). A neatly dressed, stylish look with well-coordinated accessories will get you bonus points with any escort. If your shirt or pants are baggy and ill-fitting, get them tailored. If your shoes are scuffed or worn, either have them professionally polished or invest in a new pair. Most of all, dress for your date in an ensemble that is known to compliment your looks. If you are stressing because you don’t have a clue about fashion go to the men’s department in Nordstrom and seek the assistance of a *female* employee. Nordstrom has a reputation for stellar customer service. Next stop: the perfume counter. Forget about the cheapy stuff. Ugh. If you want to sign up for charisma, a compelling perfume on a man is a major aphrodisiac for a woman. There are some incredible scents on the market for men. The high end fragrances are pure and resonate so that the scent doesn’t fade. Our ladies guarantee they will be all over their men who smell like heaven, lust and a million bucks all rolled into one!

Bag the physical looks

That’s right. Many of our companions consider looks secondary to all else when it comes to compatibility. That’s just how we women are. In fact, many ladies don’t want their men to be too good looking (that’s subjective, of course). When you are dressed well, scented like the elixir of all mankind and relaxed, you will be transformed into the poster child for the most wanted hobbyist.

Real flattery will get you everywhere

Since all of our independent escorts work hard at maintaining their beauty and physique, most are accustomed to receiving compliments. But flattery goes way beyond, “you look beautiful” or “that dress looks great on you.” It’s about, “that nail polish is a stunning color that goes perfectly with the pink tone of your dress.” Or, “that lipstick really brings out the blue in your eyes. I love it!” Scan your date and make a five-second assessment. You’ll notice those details and paying attention is what any woman really loves. When you deliver a sincere compliment, your date is sure to melt and the ice has been broken! The rest is history and you will be crowned king.


Perhaps your date is shy, too!

Let’s face it. She’s human. Maybe she struggles with shyness though you might not ever know it. Shyness is not a sign that we wear on our backs. In fact, it’s something we try to hide and often blunder in attempting to do so. But it can be painful. The fact is you do not know if she is shy so assume that she may be. Realizing this very real possibility will give you an instant advantage because suddenly you are not alone and will have boosted your confidence by ten notches.

No matter what, chemistry must prevail

At City Girls, we have to acknowledge that the psychology behind dating is a delicate balance. No matter how hard you try (or don’t try) and despite all of your concerted efforts to becoming the genteel hobbyist sought after by all independent escorts, if chemistry doesn’t flow, it’s simply not meant to be. And it’s not your fault. It just means that there is another escort waiting in the wings who is right for you and that is what we are here for.

Hannah – The Girl Wonder of Providers

She’s a natural beauty, adorable, fresh and angelic. She could easily be mistaken for a Victoria’s Secret supermodel. She’s wearing a baseball cap, long, clingy skirt and tight little t-shirt. Her hair is still damp from the shower but falls in tresses down her shoulders as though it had just been styled.

Even though she is unassuming, I can tell that she is the envy of any woman and the craving of every man. She could not be any more casual or any less perfect. We’re meeting at Starbucks as she greets me with a big, sisterly hug and all of the formalities of a well-bred, proper young lady. I catch myself marveling at her captivating features but am soon caught up in her warmth and genuineness. My intuition kicks in and I can tell that she is not only a prodigy for all providers but for women in general. She is simple, insightful and smart. Hannah is the kind of woman I want to get to know because she is so witty, down-to-earth and real. Who could ask for more? Here’s what we talked about:

  • What do you enjoy most about being a provider?
    Hannah: I love learning new things from new friends! It doesn’t matter if those things are simple or complicated. Knowledge is so important to me and even the most unimportant things can be profound.
  • What attracts you most in a client?
    Hannah: A man who is truly well-mannered and polite brings me to life! When he’s funny and humorous, I get even more attracted. But when he sincerely cares about people and shows that side to me, I’m head over heels!
  • What do you like most about yourself?
    Hannah: I feel that I’m naturally mature. Sure, I love to be silly and have fun but I never forget my responsibilities whether it’s about friends, family or other things. I’m a faithful and committed person. I am dedicated to my relationships because that’s how I was brought up. Life is a toy store! How could I ever get bored? Even when there’s nothing to do there’s something to do.
  • Would you consider yourself an exhibitionist?
    Hannah: No. But I do like it when my partner gets excited watching me when we’re in private. That really turns me on! (Hannah turns two shades of pink as she blushes from the question.)
  • What is your favorite thing to do when you have private time?
    (Hannah’s eyes drop as she chuckles and I can tell she’s going to talk about something revealing – a quality I’ve already fallen in love with.) I take pleasure in simple things like washing my clothes, reading funny stories (they make me feel good), observing my “friends” when we’re together, taking long walks. In Moscow I enjoy going to karaoke with my best girl friend. I sing very badly but I don’t care. I love it! Back home I like to take care of my plants and flowers. It’s like meditation for me. Usually by the time I get back home after touring, I see how they grew up without me as if they were wild and independent. I see how many of them I have and sometimes it even seems to me that I find myself in the film Jumanji in the scene with live, wild plants. But after my current tour here in America, I’m afraid I might find a cemetery of plants and that makes me sad but I try not to think about it.
  • What qualities in a person will win your heart?hannah
    Hannah: I love that question! It is a person with a big, open heart who is attentive and kind to me and other people; someone who is a leader, but modest and exacting at the same time; a man who is diplomatic because he understands compromise. He is calm and forgiving. When I meet such a man, I am so grateful and want to win his heart!
  • Where do you see yourself in five years?
    Hannah: In 5 years I see myself by the side of the man I love, starting a family and raising our children.
  • Why did you decide to become an escort?
    Hannah: Right now, life is about having fun, traveling and meeting new people from all over the world. It makes me so happy! Plus, I’m not in a relationship so the timing is perfect.

Finding True Girlfriends in the Escort Industry

There are those women who have a knack for collecting the coolest of girlfriends. However, for many independent escorts, it’s a challenge to find lasting girlfriends – those who withstand the test of time and are there for you through thick and thin, the good, the bad and the ugly.

I’ve heard sad stories from independent escorts how otherescorts screwed them over, dumped them or went psycho on them. Competitiveness and lack of trust seem to lurk in the dark corners of the adult entertainment and we at City Girls find that disheartening.

For some reason, it’s even more difficult to find true girlfriends in the escort industry

It’s one thing to uphold your personal standards when it comes to finding and maintaining girlfriends outside of the world of escorting. It’s quite another when you find yourself immersed in a sensual world of having fun and making good money. One morning you wake up and find yourself lonely with no one to talk to because you don’t have escort girlfriends (or those who are open-minded about your career as an adult entertainer) who understand who you are and what you do. As a woman, I would like to explore some of the principals of female friendships.
If she competes with you, she’s not your friend. Period.

Competition is not limited to just business. Even at City Girls, you are surrounded by other Club Members who are doing the same work as you – escorting. But there’s plenty to go around in life! However, if your escort girlfriend does things behind your back like talk about you or worse, try to sabotage your business, not only is she not a friend but she’s an enemy. Sometimes competition occurs on a more subliminal level. If you go shopping with your escort girlfriend, ask her opinion about a pair of shoes and she doesn’t like them, chances are she’s giving you her honest opinion. But if next week you see her wearing the same exact shoes, chances are she was competing with you because she wanted the shoes for herself. A girlfriend who competes with you is grounds for dismissal. You are better off spending an evening with your cat or going out alone than with a girlfriend who doesn’t understand or value what the word means.

Female energy is contagious

You’ve seen it and experienced it. Two women are standing at the cash register in a department store and strike up a conversation about hair products. They’ve never met. However, one could be fooled into thinking that they are long time girlfriends. That’s the power of feminine energy! On a deeper level, your escort girlfriend should empower you with genuine compliments, support and patience. She should be there for you when you get down or feel sad (though it’s not good to dump on friends on the time). You should be able to trust her. Now, there are varying tiers of friendships in which not every friend is going to be your confidante. Some friends are stronger than others in feeling your pain or praising your successes while others may not have the emotional band with due to their own issues. It’s up to you to gauge this energy and balance those friendships appropriately.

You are who your friends are

As an independent escort, if you are a dynamic woman with many interests, who likes to travel, shop, work hard, make lots of money and who aspires to accomplish things in life, your friends should share some of these similarities. Being an escort does not define who you are just as being a secretary or doctor does not define the person. Character and integrity define the person. So if you look around and find that your friends are problematic, non supportive, only around when you’re happy-go-lucky or mooch off of you because you make good money, time to weed your social garden. Even if you end up with no friends, don’t be afraid to dust the cob webs off your social life because they were never friends to begin with. As an independent escort, the only way you are going to find true girlfriends in the adult entertainment industry is if you are aligned with your true self. One true girlfriend is better than ten fake girlfriends. Don’t be afraid to recognize that they aren’t true girlfriends. You are a bigger person if you do.

Is your escort girlfriend fraught with insecurity?girlfriend escort

Whether she’s an escort, a housewife or a diplomat, if a woman is insecure it is because she does not have the resources within herself to appreciate the beauty and radiance in her girlfriends. An escort who is secure in herself has strength! She feels pretty in her own right, doesn’t feel less than others, loves her ‘sisters’ and finds great happiness in rewarding them with compliments. This is not to say that we all don’t have an insecurity floating around somewhere inside. We do! For example, fear of failure can be considered an insecurity but a huge motivator to succeed. That’s turning an insecurity into a positive!

At City Girls every interaction is a mini relationship

Part of finding happiness and fulfillment in life is achieved through establishing fruitful relationships. As an independent escort, it’s good to have at least one true girlfriend who does what you do. I have met many amazing women in adult entertainment industry who are success powerhouses, have beautiful children, and/or are money-making machines with hearts of gold. One of my best and dearest friends is a courtesan. So ladies, it is quite possible to make true girlfriends in the escort industry. But you must first really get to know yourself and be happy with the person who you are. You will in turn, attract escort girlfriends who compliment you.